When you run out of patience as a parent

I’ve had one of those days as a parent where I’m cranky, touched out, and just didn’t have the patience to deal with typical toddler behaviour. I found myself snapping at Avery for crying over things I thought were silly; I barked at her to get off of me as she climbed on my shoulders and pulled my hair with her knee; and I frustratingly uttered “COME ON, AVERY” at her behaviour more times than I can count. I normally feel pretty good about my patience level, and my ability to empathize with toddler emotions (maybe I feel emotions on a toddler level, too, sometimes…). Today just wasn’t a good parenting day. I kept asking myself, am I just extra irritable today, or is she being extra irritating?

Turned out she was getting sick. Tonight she spiked a fever. I felt bad all day for my lack of patience, but when I realized she was sick I felt extra bad.

And tonight is her Mo’s turn to do bedtime, and I can hear Avery up there crying, “I miss mommy. Avery loves mommy. Mommy’s comfy.”

So the moral of the story is, we all have our off days, and our kids definitely love us unconditionally, despite the fact that we kept losing patience with them, or we yelled at them, or we just weren’t able to comfort them in the way that they needed in a particular moment. Right now despite being touched out, I want more than anything to be cuddled up with her in her bed, telling her that my grumpiness today says nothing about how much I love her. I want to whisper in her ear as she falls asleep, “I love you so much, and I hope you feel better in the morning. And I’m sorry for being grumpy today.”

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3 thoughts on “When you run out of patience as a parent

  1. Ugh, those days are tough. My PPA/PPD has definitely been getting the better of me lately, and I’ve been finding myself having more short tempered days like this, and I always feel like crap for it. But damn if those girls still just want mommy at the end of the day, always makes you feel worse. We’re all doing the best we can. We can’t expect ourselves to be happy and cheerful 24/7, just like we can’t expect it of them. We’re all human. Hope tomorrow is a better day for all of you. 🤗

    Liked by 1 person

    • You are so right. We can’t expect perfect patience from ourselves anymore than we can expect it of them! Perfection is a myth! I’m sorry you’re struggling with PPA/PPD right now☹️ I hope you are feeling the support you need at this time! 🤗

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I had that day about two weeks ago and I just felt awful about it. I was totally rude to her, and I attributed it to being stretched too thin plus her typical toddler behavior. I will always look back on that day with regret, because I got so far from my normal even-keeled tone with her. Luckily, she doesn’t seem to remember it (though I did apologize at bedtime and we discussed how we both had a hard afternoon). It is a parenting lesson I learned and will keep with me forever.

    Liked by 1 person

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