Another first

Avery is nearly 3 and a half years old. She has ALWAYS required someone nursing, rocking, or cuddling her to sleep. We’ve loved the quality time we get with her now while we lay with her in her bed till she falls asleep – it’s a time for good conversation and lots of hugs and kisses. But we’ve also been putting the bug in her ear that we’d like her to be able to go to sleep on her own one day, when she feels ready.

We’d tried a couple of times when she thought she was ready, but as soon as we closed her door behind us she would start whimpering and saying there was a ghost, or that she missed us so much… So we’d go back in her room and say we’d try again another night.

Last night she declared that she was ready to go to bed by herself. It was my wife’s turn for bedtime, so she gave her a shower, brushed her teeth, and gave her her nightly medicine. She helped her into her pajamas, and read her a couple of books. Then she said goodnight and left the room. For a few minutes Avery laid by her door and peeked under it to see if we were still there. Then she gathered up a pile of stuffed animals and climbed into bed and went to sleep.

And that was it! Her first night going to sleep on her own was completely painless. She was ready. I don’t know if it’ll keep up every night, but I do think she got a sense of pride from it, so I’m hopeful. I’m also sad to have potentially lost that cuddle time, so we’ll have to make sure to get lots of extra cuddles in before bed and on the weekends… But having a confident child is worth a reduction in cuddles. I suppose it’s a necessary part of raising a child…

8 thoughts on “Another first

  1. Wow! That’s so nice. I am sure it will roller coaster a bit before she settles into going to sleep every single night – but what a big step! She sounds like such a sweet little girl.

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  2. Fabulous for all 3 of you. We aren’t ready until we are. Pushing doesn’t help but sharing that it will happen when the person is ready and that the cuddle/talk time is still also possible and OK is really important. That time in the dark is good for sharing time; leave the option open without definition …even at 8 or 10 or 14 or 25 or ….

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    • I once saw a post on social media about a parent who used to be bothered by society telling her that if she didn’t sleep train her son, he’d still want to sleep in her bed when he went off to college. She turned it around by sharing that when her son was a teen, he climbed into her bed one night to talk about some problem he was having at school or in his social life. I always want to leave that door open. I am not against having my kid crawl into my bed to talk at ANY age. ❤️ Thanks for your encouraging and supportive comments as always.

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  3. I’m going to need an update on this one in 1-2 weeks. I would really like M to start going to sleep on her own, though she doesn’t seem ready (and neither am I), but I want to start talking to her about it. I’m curious if it will be a quick transition or more drawn out. I’m happy for you guys, though! Sounds like kind of a dream…

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    • It only happened that once! Haha. But, she keeps talking about it and wants to try again soon. Since we’re not in a rush, the slow progress is fine 😊

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